Barney (played by Neil Patrick Harris) is the quintessential smooth operator on How I Met Your Mother, able to pick up dozens of beautiful women in any setting, and he’s never willing to take no for an answer when it comes to his crazy ideas. Barney’s willing to say what everyone else is thinking, and make it seem charming and appealing while he does it. That’s why he’s so irresistible.
Choice Quote: “The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11 months old.”
Tracy Jordan (played by Tracy Morgan), the egomaniacal, often childlike star of 30 Rock’s show-within-the-show TGS With Tracy Jordan, is forever spouting nonsensical pronouncements, making absurd demands or, occasionally, offering disturbingly apt pearls of wisdom. Even if what he says is completely baffling, it’s always memorable.
Choice Quote: “I love this cornbread so much, I wanna take it behind a middle school and get it pregnant.”
Naïve, addled and functionally illiterate, Charlie (played by Charlie Day) is the most endearing character on a show full of horrible people. Sure, he often does stupid things in the name of self-interest, but he’s not nearly as callous or mean as his It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia cohorts, and is even sort of sweet in his own misguided way. That doesn’t stop him from saying some of most ridiculous, absurd things imaginable, though.
Choice Quote: “All right, later dudes. S you in your A’s, don’t wear a C, and J all over your B’s.”
The world’s worst boss (played by Steve Carell) on The Office certainly never fails to say the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time, but he has his employees’ best interests at heart (or thinks he does). Just when you think Michael can’t possibly be more obtuse or insensitive, he comes out with another one of his obliviously offensive life lessons.
Choice Quote: “You may look around and see two groups here: white collar, blue collar. But I don’t see it that way, and you know why not? Because I am collar-blind.”
Dwight (played by Rainn Wilson) is clearly evil, even though he may just see it as being pragmatic. The creepy sociopath looks down on everyone at Dunder Mifflin except boss Michael Scott, whom he holds up as a god. Dwight’s contempt for nearly everything that anyone else does makes for some hilarious put-downs, and his weird life philosophies are just as funny.
Choice Quote: “Babies are one of my many areas of expertise. Growing up I performed my own circumcision.”
Hillbilly NBC page Kenneth (played by Jack McBrayer) may seem sweet and innocent, but he’s clearly got some dark secrets buried in his past. Those disturbing flashes of danger combine with a sunny outlook on life to give even Kenneth’s most twisted sayings a sense of joy and wonder.
Choice Quote: “I don’t drink hot liquids of any kind. That’s the Devil’s temperature!”